SemiConscious Dot Org

Normally, I decline to make New Year’s resolutions. It’s a stupid exercise in failure and self-flagellation. Why waste time making a bunch of promises that you’ll become a better person, when you’re only going to inevitably break all of them and feel miserable? And if there is a particular change of habit or lifestyle that is so important to you, why tie it to something so arbitrary as a number on the calendar? Why not do it NOW???

Nevertheless, I was inspired to make one resolution after reading this excellent post at The Sporadic Curmudgeon:

I Will Stop Automatically Assuming The Worst about G.W. Bush

This is another blood-pressure turbo-lift. Just because our so-called President is a spoiled, lying, election-stealing, city-drowning neo-fascist C-student fratboy warmonger who has devoted every millisecond since his illegal installation conspiring to bring down the institution of democracy while simultaneously maximizing the pain and suffering of the poor, that doesn’t mean he spends his evenings smashing kittens with a sledgehammer for fun.

But he’s perfectly capable of it.

Personal Chance of keeping this resolution: 0.0000000001%

Since my own blood pressure raises exponentially any time my thoughts stray to the vindictive asshat currently infesting the White House, I figured it would be a fine idea to make a similar resolution. At the very least, I might live longer. For the first couple days of January, I successfully avoided criticizing or even thinking about Our Preznit. I slept better, my food tasted better, my mood turned almost giddy.

And then, unfortunately, I read that when Dear Leader recently signed John Mcain’s anti-torture resolution into law (the one that passed the Senate by a vote of 90-9) he also signed a separate document stating his claimed right to bypass the torture restriction whenever he feels like it. Then I realized that DubYa’s stated defense for his ongoing program to illegally spy on American citizens in direct violation of both the law and the US Constitution amounts to nothing less than the Divine Right of Kings.

I think you all know what’s coming next.

Well, so much for that resolution. Five days into the new year and it’s already deader than Elvis. I’m such a failure.

Anyhoo, now that I’ve fallen off the wagon, might as well check out the latest crazy cartoon adventures of Battle Action Bush! Hours of laffs for the kiddies!

So, anyone else have any New Year’s resolutions (kept or already broken) that they’d like to share?