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March of the Brokeback Penguins
Long time readers of this site know that, other than Islamocommunofascists and their Liberal allies, no group poses a greater threat to America than agents of the insidious Gay Agenda. These fiendish plotters never sleep, working overtime to subvert our Godly nation and turn us all gayer than the Gay Mayor of Gaytown. Few know, however, that the scope of the Gay Agenda is not limited to humanity; they also seek to subvert innocent animals to their sinful lifestyle.
Specifically, penguins!
Ever since the Reverend Fundamentally Oral Bill first alerted the nation to the dangers of Penguin Lust, we have been ever vigilant. When gay penguins were discovered in a Japanese zoo last year, we knew it would be only a matter of time until the Gay Agenda began its attempts to convince Americans that this deviant avian lifestyle is somehow “normal.”
The concerns are the latest involving “And Tango Makes Three,’’ the illustrated children’s book based on a true story of two male penguins – Roy and Silo – in New York City’s Central Park Zoo who adopted a fertilized egg and raised the chick as their own.Complaining about the book’s homosexual undertones, some parents of Shiloh Elementary School students believe the book – available to be checked out of the school’s library in this 11,000-resident town 20 miles east of St. Louis – tackles topics their young children aren’t ready to handle.
Clearly, this is a crisis of Biblical proportions. If this vile book is allowed to remain on the shelves, impressionable young children might get the idea that an activity regularly practiced by penguins in the real world is somehow natural! Won’t someone think of the children???
To the ramparts, Prayer Warriors! We must defend our nation from the influx of mincing, effeminate flightless waterfowl. There are penguin souls to save! Glory!
