Loading ...
And Iran, Iran So Far Away
With his time in office sadly growing short and his Prezznitall Legacy as yet unwritten, Dear Leader had hoped to build on the rousing success of his War on Terra™ in Iraq by launching another one against Iran. Accordingly, he and his Holy administration have spent the past few years priming the oil pump, as it were, by scaring the bejeesus out of the American public with tales of imminent nukular capability in Tehran. It looked like everything was going to plan…
And then those traitorous, terrorist-loving America-haters in the American intelligence community had to go and spoil the party by letting slip the news that Iran hasn’t had a nukular program for over four years! Dear Leader gamely tried to catapult the propaganda back into his favor, insisting that Iran must come clean about the details of the program it doesn’t have and changing the definition of what constitutes a nukular program in the first place. Alas, it was clear that his yeoman work was in vain, and the Nattering Nabobs swarmed over the rotting carcass of his grandiose plans to set the world record for most separate wars started in one Presidential regime.
Clearly, bigger rhetorical guns were needed on this new front of the War on Dissent Common Sense Terra™. Accordingly, the patriotic, America-loving denizens of the Right Wing Blogosphere have charged to the rescue, doing what they do best whenever Dear Leader is contradicted – questioning the patriotism of those doing the contradicting! Huzzah, well played, sirs!
Still, it is becoming increasingly clear that Dear Leader’s noble goal of starting Armageddon and bringing on The Rapture during his time in office may, sadly, not come to fruition. Therefore, it is comforting to know that the one single man most vocal in his desire to Bomb The World Into Democracy™ is none other than the chief political advisor to the 2008 Republican presidential frontrunner. We may just get that war yet! Glory!
